Saturday Showcase - April 2006.
Posted In: Mega-Zine Chat. Reading This Thread:
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You! Me! Milkshakes!
Please vote for your bestest letter in April.
The closing date for all the votes is may 20th.
1. HAIRY HAIRCUTS.
It's funny how Cherie Blair can spend £7,700 on her hair in one month. If I was to spend £7,700, I'd at least have a haircut that didn't resemble a dead beaver on my head. She does tend to have that grin on her face like she's been slapped with a wet salmon, too.
Then again, my own haircut presently resembles the "i'm in the marines" look.
Stupid barber.
Junior Minister.
Are you on the junior rich list?
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2. SHEEP WALKING.
As I was cycling home, my new neighbours sheepdog came out and followed me. He just wouldn't leave me alone. He kept barking at sheep, then coming back and following me again. The next day, I snuck past the house quietly and managed to stop him coming out.
Then, half a mile down the road, three sheep stole my bike.
Paddy Irishman.
Are you a sheep in disguise?
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3. SUPERMANLY POWERS.
My English guard Alfred Zappa (ingeniously notoriously evidently stupid) understands Clark Kent/Supermans's latest adventure to Earth lasted years.
Damn overly elaborate superheroes normally trip in tights.
The Shamrocking Bogman.
Here come the Men in Black...or is that another film?
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4. IT'S IN THE BADGER!
Lead a busy life? Find yourself constantly late for important meetings? Buy yourself a few extra hours a day by simply using one word to replace an entire sentance.
BADGER! It's coming!
The Twirly Catcher.
Yes to all of those, but I think crocodile would sound so much better.
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5. FAST MAIL OUT.
This will end all arguements about the fastest printed 'Zine letter:
I haven't even sent this one yet!
Vigilante Maelstrom.
It's true, I can't deny it.
The closing date for all the votes is may 20th.
1. HAIRY HAIRCUTS.
It's funny how Cherie Blair can spend £7,700 on her hair in one month. If I was to spend £7,700, I'd at least have a haircut that didn't resemble a dead beaver on my head. She does tend to have that grin on her face like she's been slapped with a wet salmon, too.
Then again, my own haircut presently resembles the "i'm in the marines" look.
Stupid barber.
Junior Minister.
Are you on the junior rich list?
-----
2. SHEEP WALKING.
As I was cycling home, my new neighbours sheepdog came out and followed me. He just wouldn't leave me alone. He kept barking at sheep, then coming back and following me again. The next day, I snuck past the house quietly and managed to stop him coming out.
Then, half a mile down the road, three sheep stole my bike.
Paddy Irishman.
Are you a sheep in disguise?
-----
3. SUPERMANLY POWERS.
My English guard Alfred Zappa (ingeniously notoriously evidently stupid) understands Clark Kent/Supermans's latest adventure to Earth lasted years.
Damn overly elaborate superheroes normally trip in tights.
The Shamrocking Bogman.
Here come the Men in Black...or is that another film?
-----
4. IT'S IN THE BADGER!
Lead a busy life? Find yourself constantly late for important meetings? Buy yourself a few extra hours a day by simply using one word to replace an entire sentance.
BADGER! It's coming!
The Twirly Catcher.
Yes to all of those, but I think crocodile would sound so much better.
-----
5. FAST MAIL OUT.
This will end all arguements about the fastest printed 'Zine letter:
I haven't even sent this one yet!
Vigilante Maelstrom.
It's true, I can't deny it.
![[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/591931.jpg]](http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/591931.jpg "http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/591931.jpg")
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![[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/resources/uploads/gerrard.jpg]](http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/resources/uploads/gerrard.jpg "http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/resources/uploads/gerrard.jpg")
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![[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]](http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg "http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg")
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Jimmy:
Holy sh*t everything's Barry.
Steve-Dave:
Everything's better!
Puffalump:
Barrier
Steve-Dave:
The Barryest it's ever been
Jimmy:
I can't wait for more "Important Barry and changes"
Steve-Dave:
Well there will be some Barry and changes coming soon, because we need more donations. It no longer just takes £10 a year to help Barry survive
Steve-Dave:
It takes like... £13
Steve-Dave:
Barry has to walk 5 metres to his car every day... just to go to work and earn money for DVDs and comic books
Steve-Dave:
His eyesight is so bad... that he has to wear glasses. Stylish rimless glasses which cost €250
Steve-Dave:
His living space is so cramped... that h had to put his workout bench in the garage meaning he doesn't really use it any more
Steve-Dave:
But for just €13 a year... You can help Barry afford a DVD that he heard was good but has been out for a while so it's not as expensive as new DVDs
Steve-Dave:
Please... Give generously... And help save this poor man's DVD shelf from not being completely full because it just looks weird when it's nearly full. I mean, when it's half full, that's fine. But when there's only a few gaps left... it just looks kinda sad.... y'know
Steve-Dave:
Thank you
Rayanne Graff:
It scares me when people refer to themselves in the third person.
Steve-Dave:
It scares Professor Barrington Cornelius Smashathing XIV esq. too
Steve-Dave:
Like my Grandfather, Professor Barrington Cornelius Smashathing XII Esq. always said: "Professor Barrington Cornelius Smashathing XIV esq., Professor Barrington Cornelius Smashathing XII esq. gets scared when people refer to themselves in the third person, and Professor Barrington Cornelius Smashathing XIV esq., Professor Barrington Cornelius Smashathing XII esq. promises to never do that"
Steve-Dave:
And like my twin brother, Professor Barrington Cornelius Smashathing XIV.5 esq. (or Professor Barrington Cornelius Smashathing XIV esq. for short) says: "Professor Barrington Cornelius Smashathing XIV esq., Professor Barrington Cornelius Smashathing XIV.5 esq. doesn't like when people refer to themselves in the third person. You and Professor Barrington Cornelius Smashathing XIV.5 esq. must have gotten that from our grandfather, Professor Barrington Cornelius Smashathing XII esq."
Rayanne Graff:
You nerds crack me up.
Steve-Dave:
Professor Barrington Cornelius Smashathing XII esq., Professor Barrington Cornelius Smashathing XIV.5 esq. and Professor Barrington Cornelius Smashathing XIV esq. all try our best
Rayanne Graff:
... in the pants department.
